getting rocked as opposed to rocking

I held off on writing about the Bowling alley show in Lincoln because I didn't want to come off as whiny. The show as a whole was good, Ryan Swaar, a guy named Ted, Joe Lehnig, Gabe Kea, myself and Chris Spreyer performed for about 80 or so people. Joe stole the show and absolutely destroyed the room. And then we had an intermission. Gabe went up and did well, and then I went up; I heard a lot of dead silence during my set, though Joe told me the people in the back were laughing and I couldn't hear them. Comedians make a lot of excuses for why a set wouldn't go well; so here are some
-the PA sounded funny to me while I was on stage
-I wasn't in the right "Mind set" as my friend Matt from Colorado would say
-Following Joe (who's a little darker and a little dirtier) was harder for a clean comic (though Gabe did fine)
-Gabe brought me up, instead of the emcee, so that might have thrown the crowd
-I didn't close on the right material, though that wouldn't explain the first part of my set
-gypsies, I blame them for about everything

All of those things are excuses, which can happen, but I put a lot of stock in my comedic abilities, so I shouldn't really let them affect my thoughts on the show. To be honest I don't think I've ever been THAT down about a set, and so I was really hoping for a strong set tonight at the Bone. "You're only as good as your last set" I've heard (I don't really believe it 100%, maybe about 55.8%). I did a new line or two during my Sober bit, and have some faith it will turn into something good. My set wasn't the stellar performance I would have hoped for, but I got some laughs and was under my time, so I'll optimistically call it a win and move on. I've decided I need to start writing more/again. I've gotten lazy so I bought some new pens (dollar-fifty each) and threw away my old ones because I hate writing with them. In truth, I hate hand-writing anything, but I don't like typing during "free writing" so I guess I have to suck it up and just get to it.

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