can't can't can't can't can't stop the feet

Last night I went up first at Laughs on the Landing; I only really remember two things, I wanted to work on the sex and sports, lucky mike, and new dating material, but I ended up doing some older stuff I haven't done in a while. The one thing I remember about my set is I need to move my feet more.
Two of the books I ordered came in today, which was really unexpected; The Comic Toolbox and Comic insights, I'm going to read some of the first tonight.

absolutes

Last night I wasn't up at the Funny Bone, and since I don't have any local friends, I didn't have anyone there to see me, and since Scott asked how many people the comics brought, I was pretty sure I wasn't getting on. Usually I would hang out and watch the other comics, but I really wanted to work on some writing exercises. Sadly I don't know any. I asked Matt Behrens (who did a workshop last summer at the Funny Bone with Jimmy Rice) on ideas for books to get so I could learn some and he said that was Jimmy's department. I emailed Jimmy and then got impatient (as often happens) and so I jumped on amazon.com and I ordered:
The Comic Toolbox: How to Be Funny Even If You're Not,
Comic Insights: The Art of Stand-up Comedy,
How to Be a Working Comic: An Insider's Guide to a Career in Stand-Up Comedy (How to Be a Working),
Comedy Writing Step by Step,
Complete Idiot's Guide to Comedy Writing (The Complete Idiot's Guide),
How to Write Funny: Add Humor to Every Kind of Writing,

Since I signed up for some sort of amazon.com credit card the above only cost me 40 bucks. Booyah.
One thing is kind of bugging me about last night, specifically about me leaving early. That is, that I did (leave early). It's weird, but I deal primarily in absolutes, I either do something or I don't. All or none. For example; I go to the gym 5 days a week, because if I only went 3, I would end up skipping one day and then 2 in a row and pretty soon I'd be out of the habit. That's how I deal with comedy, too. I used to go to EVERY show I could get in the door at, (which was fun) and people recognized my visible efforts. That's why when people said I was hard working, it was such a compliment (and even more so when they used the superlative "hardest"). Anyway, I'm kind of afraid if I miss a night, people will think less of me. Now first off; let me clarify that statement. I don't give a crap what people think about me; he's smart, attractive, goofy, stupid. I've never been popular, and I'm comfortable with that. I don't care what people think of me. Period. What I do care about is my work ethic and my reputation. I don't want people to be able to say I'm lazy or a bad comic. I remember once, Gabe Kea said "Wait, Marcus isn't at an open mic, what's up with that?" He didn't mean it in a bad way, but he was just surprised that I wouldn't be somewhere where there was stage time. I don't want people to think I'm not hungry anymore, but I also want to write some new (decent) bits. I guess I just need to do what I feel will make me a better comic. And I don't feel I've progressed a whole lot in the past couple months, so it's probbaly time to swicth some crap up.

stupid audience... or lack thereof

Last night I headed over to Molly O'Briens. Nick Kousamano was there setting up with a guy named Marvell (accent on the first syllable). Anyway, Nick and I were the only comics. Also there wasn't so much a crowd for a while. Eventually a 4-top moved from the bar area into the restaurant area where we were set up at. Apparently they were from New York, and a little unappreciative of the show. Eventually they got up and left. I never got on stage. That wasn't what I am going to remember about the trip, though.
I was talking to Anthony Joplin about running a show. Anthony mentioned wanting to concentrate on writing and thus wasn't interested. Anthony and I talked about working on writing versus working on stage pressence. Good material can be funny despite a weak pressence, but it seems very hard to make weak material funny despite a strong pressense. A couple people have referred to me as "the hardest working comic in st louis" becuase I go to all the less-than-awesome shows. I think I would like to concentrate on writing more, but I need to develope some excercises or get some books or something. I might try to ask around at the clubs. I have two Judy Carter books and Zen and the Art of Stand Up Comedy, but I don't remember getting too many writing tips from them... If anyone reading this has a suggestion, let me know.

Strike 3

OK, so I've bee feeling a bit lazy blog-wise this week, so let's cover what I missed.

Tuesday; Funny Bone. Hosted by Rahn Ramey. I wasn't on so I dropped a comic strip that night. I called it Uno Dos Tres. I ran my political joke by a couple people, but only Gabe Kea really laughed (note: Gabe didn't really laugh as in laugh hard but he really laughed as in laughed at all).

Wednesday: Laughs at the Landing. I tried a bunch of new stuff, and can't say that the crowd was overly impressed. But that's the way it goes. After my new stuff, I phoned in some of my older jokes. I've got to get out of the habit of doing that.

Thursday: Café Louis. Hosted by Nick Kousamano. I show up and this time the place is closed. Nick's outside waiting. It's hot and humid out, therefore unpleasant. Eventually someone shows up to open the door and I help Nick unload a ton of crap (speakers, a TV monitor, sound board, cables et al). One guy came in for aobut 5 minutes (if that) and then left. Around 9:15 I give up and drive home while listening to my DVR from last Wednesday.

Friday: Express Scripts: I typed this blog.

Requesition me a beat

Last night I wound up at Maggie O'Briens hoping to do my very first politcal joke ever. Instead, I learned that no one else had showed up (again) and the staff didn't know what was going on. Todd Shoemacher showed up and we talked shop for a bit at the bar, but around 9:30 we split. (I made it home in time for Futurama, it was the episode where Hermes is sent to a resort/slave labor planet and Fry has an affair with a bureaucrat who steals Bender's brain).

"I am Bender, Baby! Please Insert Liquor!"

double deuce action!

Last night at LL, I destroyed my cardinal rule. And I couldn't be happier. I've listened to my set a couple times, and I think it went alright. Some of my new "jokes" weren't so much jokes as stories. I came up with a couple new one-liners that could turn into full bits. Gabrial Kea plugged my website again, which is really pretty funny. He says something like "My name's Gabrial Kea and I have a website, it's W W W Dot Marcus Is Funny Dot Com. Gabe ended up winning the 2,500 penny prize,

Tonight I drove down to Cafe Louis on Washington Ave. Nick Kousemano was supposed to be hosting a show down there, and after the fun I had at Maggie O'Briens, I figured it'd be cool. Anyway, I show up at 8:30pm (show time) and there is one guy (the owner) there. He was on the phone with Nick, and eventually put me on the phone. Nick wanted me to host and run the thing, but I wasn't really feeling it, so I bailed. I told the guy there (Tom?) that he probably wasn't going to have a show due to no crowd and no comedians. I'm not sure if he was upset with that or not.
Normally that'd kind of annoy me, but I've had a decent time of comedy this week, so O'll just chalk that up to Equivalent Exchange.

passive aggressive THIS

Quick note: I forgot to mention Ed Calhoun in yesterday's blog. He was at the show monday, and rifted a great set, doing what seemed to be no prepared material at all. He also made fun of me a lot on stage, which was actually pretty funny.

Now, onto last night: Last night I was not on stage. I got a little upset when I went to get a pen and found that my "pen case" was not in my "back pack". Which sucked because some "headphones" which I bought at "Best" Buy and cost "10 dollars" were in the case. I had plans on hanging out afterwards and checking out the kareoke scene next door. I welched and went to bed as I was sleepy.
Anyway, today I came home and looked on my couch, and there was the pen case. I repeat: THE CASE IS OK.

What the crap?

Dear Marcus Is Funny Dot Com, Gabe made fun of me today, and it hurt my feelings... It all started last night when I stopped by Maggie O' Brien's on Market Street (very near Union Station). Tom Milster was already there, Gabriel Kea and Anthony Joplin showed up after a bit. Nick Kousamano was there setting stuff up, and guy named L.C. was there hosting. There were also a couple others, including a guy with a white ZZ-top "neck beard" and a guy named Joe who went first, drank what may have been alcohol (possibly gasoline) on stage, kept talking about how unfunny he was and got some of the mystery liquid on my shirt. Then he left because he "has a day job tomorrow". There were less than 10 non-comics in the room, and that always spells awesome set, especially when no one laughs at the first guy up. I thought I was going to follow Joe, and I was going to say "That's the quality of comic you get when you have free grab rangoon in the back (oh yeah, they had free crab rangoon, it was fantastic). Tom Milster had to follow Joe, or in actuality, he had to follow L.C. who did probably 5 to 10 between each comic. In any case, the crowd wasn't exactly "pumped". Plus L.C. kept talking to "Santa" (the guy with the neck beard) who kept responding. The guy gave Tom some lip and Tom gave a "Shut up, Uncle Jesse" in return. I almost fell out of my chair. I followed Tom (or L.C., or both) and according to my DVR, I did about 8 minutes. I tried the old "How are you guys doing?" [Pause for audience] "You guys can do better than that, this is my Make a Wish" line. However right when I said "You guys can do better than that" they did, and the audience stepped on my punch line. I'm not too upset, though because they seemed kind of riled up.
I also tried a new approach, which was saying that I was a clean comic. I'm trying to get a joke out of that so I can lead into the subject, but the bit I tried last night needs some work. After that, I noticed Gabe was in the back talking to some girl. On September 9th Matt Wolff did a similar thing at the Red Sea, so I started talking about Gabe (briefly narrating what he was doing, really). Anyway, I think I opened up Pandora's box on that one, because Gabe got me back when he was on stage. But we'll get to that. I tried a new approach on my 'dumped in email' joke, and instead of going into fat jokes, I tried to make myself more of a victim ("she could have just told me the day before when I had driven three hours to see her") so the audience would sympathize with me more. I'll have to work on that a bit more.
I went into my dating examples, and one of the audience members noticed I used the word "damn", which I don't consider dirty. While talking to the audience, I threw in a joke about my initials ("MR") that I've been playing with. I ended my set and hung around for a while.
Anyway, when Gabe got up, I don't remember how it went down, but he plugged my website. Gabe didn't tell jokes, really, on stage, he just played. At one point, I think he started doing an impression of me typing in my blog, and it involved my Blog being theraputic, almost like a psychiatrist. You kind of had to be there, but it made me laugh. Afterwards Gabe apolozies, we hugged and went to get ice cream and search for Jesse James' lost fortune.

Select all, SELECT ALL!

Please note, the above entry is intended to be a mock-journal entry. Gabe did not hurt my feelings. We did not hug. We did not get ice cream nor did we look for Jesse James treasure. And no, that is not a gay metaphor.

What, did you expect to find something cool? Go away!

A Lovable Loser...

Last night I headed down to LL for the open mic. I showed up around 8ish and tried to get a couple thoughts down about my non-drinking. I seem to remember thinking something funny about my sobriety, but I don't remember it. I talked to one of the comics, Mike. He's one of the improvers that works at LL, I've also seen him at City Improv in Union Station. Last night was also open mic at the Comedy Forum, so a lot of comics were probably there instead of LL. Myself, John Garrison, Anthony Joplin, and Gabe Kea were the only "funny bone regulars" there. My set seemed to go pretty well; again I took the mic out of the stand, and made sure to shift my feet at least once. I didn't get laughs in a couple places I would have wanted them, but I didn't get dead silence, either. I call that a win. Afterwards, I was talking to John Garrison, who mentioned that I looked more, 'pleasant' on stage. Apparently (and I agree with this) I've been seeming more and more bitter on stage, especially with all the fat jokes at the expense of my ex-girlfriend. John called me a "lovable loser", comic. That is, I'm likable, but things just don't go my way (and that's what I talk about on stage). If I want to gripe about getting dumped, I shouldn't focus on my ex's weight because I might loose my connection with the audience. Plus, John said, I'm not "that kind" of comic. I agree, even though I couldn't define what "that kind" of comic is, I can kind of see it in my head, and I'm not it. I'm also working on changing my "wardrobe", again last night I wore jeans and a t-shirt, and I felt really comfortable on stage. I also wore my "Marcus Jacket" that I stole from the tire shop when I worked at the Sam's Club in Columbia (I didn't wear it on stage, just wore it because it was kind of cold out).

When it rains, it pours... I hope...

Nothing feels quite as good as doing well stage, except doing good on stage after a serious laugh drought. Last night I got some laughs, which really rocked, I tried out the "Sex is like Sports" comparison and it kind of worked. I did my "bad at dating" examples and actually got a sympathy "awww" when I did the Valentine's baby sitter one. I thanked the audience but told them I would rather have laughs...
I pulled the mic out of the stand and held it, which is different from usual. I also shifted my feet a bit, which I had to concentrate on. Paul Harris said I looked really comfortable on stage, and that I looked like I was having fun. There were a two groups of younger girls in the audience, so I did some of my college material, and I ended on my "Blackest thing" joke. I think I need to re work that joke, not trim the fat, but re work it. I think it's too abrupt, and it may need some more words.

2 four 1

I was pretty upset with my performance last Wednesday; and really believe that my presence on stage has something to do with it; I don't really move when I'm on stage, my feet are planted pretty firmly and I think that comes off as lacking "self confidence". The trick, it seems, is to walk up believing you're the funniest person in the room.
The problem with self confidence (if you ask me) is that it is fairly dependent on doing well. And doing well is fairly dependent on having self confidence. See where I'm going with that...? I think luck is thrown in there somewhere...

Last night was the Bel Air Bowl open mic. Myself, Tom Milster, A guy named Brandon (aka "Whack") and Stevie P (I've seen him at the Forum before) showed. Steve and Brandon each brought a buddy along. Since we apparently didn't have an audience to work with, we each did a set and then turned the time after to workshop. I prefaced my thoughts last night with this disclaimer: I don't know what I am talking about, but this is what I think. None of us were qualified to host a workshop last night, but we made the best of the situation, so I'd call last night a win.
It's late now and I'm off to the Funny Bone.

1/2 and half

Last night, the Funny Bone was pretty packed, presumably with people packing free passes that expired this morning. I wasn't on stage, but the show was still pretty good. There were a couple guys from Kansas City, and they were pretty funny, though very angry on stage. I was in and out of the showroom all night, because I wanted to talk shop with some comics and they were at the bar. Also, The comics are being coralled into an area in the far left of the room. We're literally fenced in. I don't mind, but the area is pretty small, and a bunch (and I mean at least 4) of comics were talking and wouldn't shut the crap up. Some people were whispering, which is cool, especially when they only say 1 or 2 things at a time, but other guys were holding very audible conversations, and call me crazy but I was in the show room to watch (and listen to) comedy. But I guess they had other plans... who knows. Anyway, it's open mic at LL tonight, they're having improv troupe auditions, which would be kind of neat to look into, but I'm not sure if I'm going to go. I've done some improv before, but it was just a bunch of college students and it was very self-directed, so we didn't really know what was going on or supposed to be going on. Then again, I enjoy the "science"¹ aspect of comedy, and would like to learn more about other "schools" of comedy. Then again, I would really like to approach comedy more as an "art"², where less-thought and more-passion and -reaction goes into it and comes out of me.
Not being on stage last night, I went home and "busted out" this. Therefore I was too tired to write in this until now.
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these definitions aren't official, I haven't read them anywhere, they're just what I see when I think about comedy.

1. science of comedy: the rules of comedy. To me this includes stuff like the setup, punchline, tag protocol and things like the rule-of-three and a heavy emphasis on word choice.

2. art of comedy: an approach of comedy where the rules aren't as strictly followed, and word choice isn't as important as the accent and way the words are delivered and presentation over all.