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Tonight I did not get to go to starbucks to write before the funny bone open mic. Instead I had to wait for a lady who came to buy my couch. So I made some cash, which is nice, but I didn't write or really go over my set at all for tonight (we'll get to that later). When I finally did get to westport, I stopped by the funny bone and then headed to starbucks. My voice has been sounding hoarse (to me at least) and so I've starting drinking warm tea to make my throat feel better. I was headed to Starbucks with the intention of getting a hot tea, but Jeff the barista there, knows my order (Venti Hot Chocolate) and was already making it by the time it was my turn to order. I took that as a sign to keep up the hot chocolate streak, because on the way over to the coffee shop I wondered if having a 100% streak in something mundane like a coffee shop order was worth perserving. Saying “so-and-so always does this” sounds better than saying “well, usually...”
I didn't really go over my set very much tonight because it was the same set I did at the bootcamp last week. My new bully joke, the 2nd person shooter and the math stuff with the word problems joke. My bully joke needs a punch at the end, I could tell tonight that it needed a little work (the audience at the 11:00PM showcase weren't great for judging material). Tommy Johnagin suggested I go back to having the bully be a chick, which sounds like a good idea. I'll tinker with it and try it again next week. I did the “is this coming out in binary” line as a throwaway during the “improper” / “fraction” stuff. I keep forgetting that I want to add “mean” to that. The other day I seriously just tried to string together a dozen math vocab terms just to see how long I could go. It's harder than you'd think. My closer tonight was the word problems joke. It's really not strong enough to close on, but we were only doing 3 minutes tonight and I wanted to do it. So I did. One thing I decided to work on last week (and I don't think I had time, and I don't remember if I wrote about this yet) was to stop doing my closer like it's my closer. There's no reason to suddenly amp up the energy or start selling differently than I have been. I shouldn't cue the audience to act a certain way (I doubt that I'm doing a good job of psyching them up for my big finale, if that's what I'm supposed to be doing). From now on, I'm going to do my closer like I'm doing another joke behind it, same pause for laughs (hopefully) and then “Thank you, my name is...” only I'll say “Marcus Robinson”.

The Last Day of Bootcamp.

Today was the final day of the Kyle Cease Standup Bootcamp. I was fortunate enough to work with Bob Bledsoe (who gave me some excellent quotes for my book) during the one-on-ones (which is kind of a misnomer, but in the good way. The headliners would concentrate on one comic at a time, but the other comics in the group/pod were able to listen and offer input (which was great because having more brains working is better than having less brains working. That makes sense, right?). After Bob, I joined Ant's group because I wanted to work on my word problem joke.
I hit an amazing streak of luck because I was able to work with literally one-on-one for twenty three minutes and he helped me reword my facebook bully joke and now instead of being 20 seconds long, it's around a minute and includes an act-out and a bunch of personal details from my years in gradeschool. After that, we worked on my 2nd person shooter joke, which I admit I don't quite have the hang of in its new incarnation. Kyle bought pizza for the entire class today, which was excellent, although I never paid attention to what kind (restaurant/brand) it was. Kyle lead us through a relaxation exercise to help with the nerves of an Industry Showcase, and awarded 5 people the chance to pick their spot on the lineup. I didn't get to pick my spot, but I wasn't really nervous because my confidence level was pretty high through most of the day. After the actual seminar ended, we had a bunch of time to unwind between the end of the actual bootcamp and the showcase (which was scheduled for 10:30 but started closer to 11:00). Jon Lovitz headlined a show at 8:30 so I caught his set, and he's really funny. He also plays the piano now and had a weird 15 minute chunk on Bob Sagot being gay. It was hilarious, and a rumor (Jon's joke was that he was responsible for spreading the rumors).
The showcase was really amazing. I am/was very proud to be able to watch the progress of so many talented young and veteran comics. Some of the sets tonight were simply legendary, including Carl's, Dartanyon's, and Donna's (to name just a couple). I went up last (except for Dave, who wasn't in the class, but was part of the sound and video crew (he is also a comic, and was involved with the last bootcamp). I started my set by thanking the camera men, the sound guy (who cued up It's A Long Way To The Top If You Wanna Rock N Roll off my iPhone, and the guys in the director's booth. Then I opened with the brand new joke Ant helped me write about my bully from grade school. After that it was my revised 2nd shooter bit, then the Math Problems joke (now with no Leroy (sorry, Leroy)), Sudoku, my new Word Problems joke and I closed on the bit about being sober and people booing me.
I went on stage around 2:26AM and had been up since 7:00AM so I was very tired (also, my hands hurt from all the clapping and my voice is feeling kind of sore from all the talking, cheering and screaming from the past 5 days (the screaming was during the shows. You gotta show some support). I caught a break because about 2 comics from the end, Kyle had everyone come down to the front rows (the club is three stories high, I don't know if I mentioned that). It made a difference Ithink especially since the show was long and a bunch of the audience left before I got on. Their loss.
After the show, all the comics said their goodbyes and took some final pictures and I got lucky and caught a ride to the airport with Dave, Diego A. and Halli B. Right now it's 5:17am, and I have almost been up for 24 hours. My flight boards in 70 minutes and I don't have wifi, so I can't post this online until I get home probably. Either way I think I'm going to take a quick nap. I plan on taking another nap on the plane, AND THEN taking yet another nap when I get home (please note: the third nap will probably end up being closer to hibernation). I haven't checked my credit card balance online yet, and I'm a little afraid to, but no matter what I spent this week, the experience was absolutely worth it, and next time I'll probably try to get some of the St Louis comics to come out. I'm already planning on going.
But for now, I plan on taking a nap. OK. BurgerKing, then a nap.

Rip it like a Band-Aid

Tonight, my 1000 word essay is going to be about the show I was in at the John Lovitz Comedy Club in Universal City, CA. This was officially the first open mic I've done in California. The original lineup contained 26 comics and was hosted by Frazier Smith who did an excellent job. The JLCC is three stories and the capacity sign indicated that 542 occupants could enjoy a comedy show at the club. We had 12. I went up 23rd. After comic #20 or so, 4 people left, so I performed in front of the remaining 8 customers and probably 20 more bootcamp comics and other comics who aren't in the bootcamp. My set went alright, considering the crowd size. I'm working on loosing my comic accent (which I can only describe as talking AT the audience as opposed to talking to the audience (Kyle Cease told me to talk to them like I'm having a conversation with a friend). I've heard that advice before, and sometimes I don't have the accent, but the majority of the time, I probably do). It's easier to drop the accent with smaller crowds, because in an intimate setting like that, you have to be conversational with the crowd so you can make them feel more comfortable.
We were given three minutes tonight, which doesn't seem like much time, but I planned on doing my Bone Tom, Facebook Bully, 2nd Person Shooter, Math Problems, Sudoku and Word Problems jokes (the last of which was inspired by Ant during the bootcamp and is therefore my newest joke). I ended up doing my PANTS, my Sober Bacon and Gay Bar jokes. I didn't time myself, and since they light you with 2 minutes to go, I don't think I went over but I might have. I didn't time myself because the stool got moved to the back of the stage before I went on (at one point it was in perfect position to put my iPhone on). Tomorrow night during the filmed showcase I don't think I'm going to do the PANTS joke because my voice hasn't been in good enough shape to facilitate screaming (my voice has started cracking again like I'm in puberty. It's probably because I sing loudly to rock and metal songs when I drive).
I was really impressed with my fellow comics tonight, because I know a lot of them have far less experience on stage than I do (some of them performed for the 1st time tonight, others haven't broken 10 yet and they did great in front of the small audience). I was especially impressed by one comic, Joann, who didn't want to go up. I told her she should (and I won't assume she did because of me, but she did go on stage and did great). Ed Driscoll touched on the subject today and said that being nervous means you care. I agree 100%. It's like the anxiety I get on family float trips when I climb the cliff and am looking at the river below. You know you have to jump, that's why you climbed up there. But looking down at the water is scary. From that perspective it looks much worse than it is. When there are only one or two comics before you, it's like standing on that cliff. But you have to jump. Once you do, the anxiety leaves and before you know it you're in the water and everyone's cheering for you and clapping because you did it (it helps having my nieces and nephews jumping off the cliff too, because if a 13 year old Monica jumps, I'm not going to bail out. Probably because my family would never let me live it down). I wish I was able to come up with an analogy about ripping off a band-aid because the phrase “rip it like a band-aid” sounds really cool to me. As a kid, taking a band-aid off is a scary deal, especially if you have any amount of body hair near the adhesive. But when you rip it on stage and conquer your fear, you get to see yourself stronger than before. The wound is not longer a problem, it's healed and you're stronger than before. Kyle likes to quote Tony Robins (sp?) and say “When you think you can't, you must”.
Today Louie Anderson talked to us about comedy and told us that no one ever died doing comedy (I know some comics have passed because of how they let comedy affect their lives, but no one ever actually died on stage because they ate it. So the worst-case scenario just got a lot less terrifying because the only real fear is rejection. And who cares what a crowd of strangers thinks anyway? The biggest thing I'm learning from the bootcamp this week is that vulnerability is actually power. Being able to admit that you're vulnerable to an audience proves that you're human and have so much in common with them. When comics open up on stage and talk about their lives, the trials, tribulations and other t-words (T-Ravs?), the audience relates because everyone has a weakness that scares them. Admitting you have one to others can get the audience on your side as quickly as a hilarious joke. Granted the joke gets laughs which is the preferred method of payoff, whereas relating to the audience can move the audience emotionally. That's not always exactly what comics are looking for, but it certainly does make people remember you (and hopefully they want to see you succeed so maybe they come back to another show to see you rip it like a band aid the next time).
My advice to new comics, if any ever read this (and I think they will, if I can finish the standup book I want to write) is that you have to perform. That's why you came to the club, that's why you flew to Los Angeles, that's why you climbed the cliff. The thrill of performing, the thrill of facing your fears, staring them in the face and not backing down is better than any high, any drug, any thing.
Even if the waitstaff outnumbers the audience.
I love my life.

All hail King Marcus

I haven't written a blog in a very long time, because I was tired of just saying "I was at the Funny Bone, I did these jokes, I had a good/bad set". There's nothing interesting there. Now, I feel I have something interesting to say.

I'm in Los Angeles, California at a standup comedy bootcamp put on by Kyle Cease at the John Lovitz comedy club in Universal City. This week, we've been focusing on finding our true selves, the things that make us as humans and comic truly unique (for instance, I am unique because I wasn't popular in grade school, so I fled to a seminary where I could feel safe. The seminary left me without much experience dealing with women, so I have a hard time understanding their psychology, which is why the married woman who took my virginity and offered me money to kill her husband didn't scare me away, because either I still wanted a woman to pay attention to me. The seminary often left the exiles (or whatever you want to call ex-seminarians) clinging to the first woman who we found that paid attention to us on the outside world).

Kyle mentioned Saturday that Stephen King writes 2000 words a day, and since, as Kyle said, we're not Stephen King, 1000 words a day should be acceptable. And since then I've written 1000 words a day on various topics that are personal to me that other people may or may not have. I went through some of the pages and highlighted the stuff that I think is more interesting and has potential to be funny. My new goal I think is to start doing a new minute each week about personal stuff.

I'm really looking forward to becoming a much deeper comedian on stage, and with a couple tips and tricks I'm learning, I'm going to get a lot funnier.